am i thinking too much??

my little brain think quite a lot recently.. i dont know why this will happened, it just like a movie which keep on playing some sort of questioning games.. this isnt fun and most of the times it make me emo..

my age now obviously is old enough to work and survive myself.. but i dont.. i'm still studying for another 2 more yrs to go. By keep on asking money from my family is now my only way to survive myself.. Honestly, i hate doing that.. really, i swear.. i hate the feeling of depend against people.. i wish i could do anything i can, just only by my own.. but life will always not giving people an easy way to live.

i'm not sure will it maybe because of i had make some new friends recently which are really smarter than me.. they did changed my mind-set.. i realize that there is not short-cut way if we want to success.. not even a genius,  putting a lot of efforts is the only way for that..

honestly, i know myself well, not the smart type.. so i dont know where is my limit, i dont know how much more i could do.. but still, i have to do make thing done.. because i know, that will be the only way for me, to give a better life for my family..